Saturday, June 24, 2006

Thank God for church ladies with typewriters.

A few choice quotes (from spam Dean sent me):

The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals.


The sermon this morning: "Jesus Walks on the Water." The sermon tonight: "Searching for Jesus."


Our youth basketball team is back in action, Wednesday at 8PM in the recreation hall. Come out and watch us kill Christ the King.


Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale. It's a chance to get rid of those
things not worth keeping around the house. Bring your husbands.


The peacemaking meeting scheduled for today has been cancelled due to a conflict.


Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our community. Smile at someone who is hard to love. Say "Hell" to someone who doesn't care much about you.


Don't let worry kill you off - let the Church help.


Miss Charlene Mason sang, "I will not pass this way again," giving obvious pleasure to the congregation.


For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.


Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles, and other items to be recycled.
Proceeds will be used to cripple children.


Please place your donation in the envelope, along with the deceased person you want remembered.


The ladies of the Church have cast off clothing of every kind. They may be seen in the basement on Friday afternoon.


This evening at 7 PM, there will be a hymn singing in the park across from the Church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin.


Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 PM. Please use the back door.


The Associate Minister unveiled the church's new tithing campaign slogan last Sunday: "I Upped My Pledge - Up Yours."

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