Sunday, October 30, 2005

Glue Huffer

Elvis had a twin who died at birth.
A cockroach can live nine days without its head.
If God didn’t intend us to eat bacon,
why did he make it taste so good?
A honeybee makes less than one half teaspoon of honey in its life.
A tooth placed in a glass of Coke will dissolve overnight.
If nicotine is a stimulant, why does it calm people?
Peanuts are an ingredient of dynamite.
We use only ten percent of our brains.
Do you weigh more or less after you fart?
Goldfish kept in a bowl go blind.
Early retirees die sooner.
Coke is also an effective spermicide.
What happens with the other 75 percent?
You can walk barefoot across a bed of coals because the ash is cool.
Dogs have cleaner mouths than humans,
even though they lick their own butts.
A penny dropped off the Empire State Building
can cut a hole through a man without killing him.
You can walk barefoot across a bed of coals because of the steam
created by the sweat on the bottoms of your feet.
Will clogs ever come back in style?
Is it identity theft if the person is dead?
He gave me a reovirus for a souvenir.
Like a big black crow hunched over something in the road.
Human hair is indestructible to everything but fire.

2 comments:

Justin Evans said...

This is a very interesting piece. Thank you for posting it.

jenni said...

Yea, it is interesting. You could take every line and make a poem from it alone! Cool.