From a group email that's been going around (thanks Amy W.):
"An elderly gentleman went to the local drug store and asked the pharmacist for the little blue "Viagra" pills.
The pharmacist asked, "How many?"
The old man replied, "Just a few, maybe a half dozen. I cut each one into four pieces."
The pharmacist said, "Oh my. That's too small a dose. That won't get you through intimacy."
The old fellow said, "Look. I'm past eighty years old and I don't even think about intimacy much anymore . . . I just want it to stick out far enough so I don't pee on my new shoes."
We now return you to your regular programming.