Sunday, August 12, 2007

From yesterday's Poetry Daily, this amazing found/list/abecedarian/political poem. It's fascinating, really. Why no antlers in Azerbaijan? No almanacs in Denmark, no umbrellas in Brazil? And in Iraq: no binoculars allowed, while in Iran it's no fashion magazines. Peru wants no underwear or communist propaganda. Sri Lanka wants no volleyballs, while Vatican City refuses live animals or human remains (interesting combo). It's by Deborah Golub, and originally appeared in jubilat Number 13.

Entry Forbidden
[Selections from the International Mail Manual, "Country
Conditions for Mailing," May 2005, U.S. Postal Service]

ALBANIA
Extravagant clothes and other articles contrary to Albanians' taste.
Items sent by political emigres.

ALGERIA
Funeral urns.
Saccharine.

AZERBAIJAN
Cutting and stabbing arms, knuckledusters, stiletto blades, balls of
paralyzing fluid.
Antlers, and the horns of the species Cervidae.

BAHAMAS
Radioactive materials.
Skimmed milk in tins.

BANGLADESH
Quinine, colored pink.

BELARUS
Metallized yarn made with or made of gold thread.
Opium.

BOTSWANA
Honey and preparations of honey including royal jelly, preserves
sweetened with honey, and flypaper.
Prison-made goods.

BRAZIL
Cigarettes, cigarillos, cigars.
Umbrellas, or any other articles containing swords, daggers, or guns.
Primary educational books not written in Portuguese.

BULGARIA
"Musical" cards (cards that play a sound recording when opened).

BURMA (MYANMAR)
All goods manufactured outside Her Majesty's dominions and bearing
the British Royal Arms or imitations thereof; or bearing as a mark
or label a portrait of any member of the Royal Family of England.
Toy pistols.

CANADA
An issue of a publication that contains an advertisement primarily
directed to a Canadian market is a prohibited import if that
advertisement does not appear in identical form in all editions of the
issue distributed in the country of origin.
Secondhand hives.

COSTA RICA
Dual-graduation feeding bottles.

DENMARK
Almanacs (except for single copies) that do not bear the university
almanac stamp.
Fine-cut tobacco in small packages to which cigarette papers are
attached.

DOMINICAN REPUBLIC
Books addressed to bookshops in care of banking institutions.

ECUADOR
All maps showing the territory of Ecuador with incorrect boundaries.
So-called "Panama" hats.
Bits and mouthpieces made of copper.

GERMANY
Absinthe.
Articles bearing political or religious notations on the address side.
Melatonin.
Playing cards, except in complete decks properly wrapped.
Pulverized coca beans.

GREAT BRITAIN AND NORTHERN IRELAND
Horror comics and matrices.

GUATEMALA
Gardenia plants and seeds.
Police whistles.

GUYANA
Bees.

ICELAND
Sausages.
Toys made of lead.

INDIA
Arms and military equipment, except for the Indian government.

IRAN
Fashion newspapers.

IRAQ
Binoculars.

IRELAND (EIRE)
Peat moss litter except under license.

ITALY
Artificial flowers.
Bells.
Bonnets.
Chloroform.
Hair.
Leeches.
Ribbons for typewriters.

ISRAEL
Games of chance.
Soil and sand.

JORDAN
Advertisements concerning treatment of venereal diseases or medicinal
preparations intended to serve as preventatives against those
diseases.

KAZAKHSTAN
Deer hooves.
Nuclear materials.

LEBANON
Artificial butters.

LESOTHO
Eau de cologne.
Military uniforms.
Printed matter relating to football pools.

LIECHTENSTEIN
Mini-spies (miniature wireless transmitters).

LUXEMBOURG
Postcards embellished with fabrics, embroidery, spangles, except in
sealed envelopes.

MALAWI
Aphrodisiacs.
Correspondence concerning fortune telling.

MALAYSIA
Harpoons.

MALDIVES
Gunpowder.
Weapons of war.
Intoxicants.
Poisons.
Nitrates.
Pork.
Statues used for worship.
Pornographic material.

PAKISTAN
Arms, ammunition except when sent on behalf of the government.

PANAMA
Pastries.

PARAGUAY
Tomato juices.
Socks except those made of jersey.

PERU
Underwear.
Communist propaganda.
Contraceptive products.
Dolls.
Waxes and creams for shoes.

SAN MARINO
Albums of any kind (of photographs, postcards, postage stamps, etc.).

ST. LUCIA
Shaving brushes made in Japan.

SLOVAK REPUBLIC (SLOVAKIA)
Chain letter items.
Sheets of music, etc., contrary to the State public order.

SRI LANKA
Volleyballs.

VATICAN CITY
Human remains.
Live animals.

VIETNAM
Invisible ink, codes, ciphers, symbols or other types of secret
correspondence, and shorthand notes.
Used mosquito nets.

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